Confessions of a Bridesmaid

There comes a day in every girl’s life when she is asked the question by her best friend, “Will you be my bridesmaid?” At first you are thrilled for her and feel privileged to be part of her very special day. Soon the excitement of her engagement is taken over by the hours of detailed planning, budget discussions, dress fittings…and then the novelty begins to wear off.

I have been a bridesmaid in six, yes six, weddings in just five years. I consider myself a bridesmaid expert, if you will, and have seen it all—from brides who barely show up to their own event to the ultimate of “brideszillas.”

If you’re just getting started in your “bridesmaid career,” here are a few tips to keep in mind:

All brides will tell you this, and it is simply not true. A bridesmaid dress is a bridesmaid dress, and it will never look like anything else. The good news is there are more stylish options than there were five years ago, but mass alterations would still be required to transform your bridesmaid dress into anything you would wear post wedding.

When your friend is telling you all about her plans for the big day, resist the urge to tell her how you would do it better. Even if she sticks you in a less than flattering cut or color, strap on your smile and tell her you love it.

I used to become frustrated by all the wedding related events and bridesmaid requirements. It took me some time, money and maturity to realize not only am I expected to participate in everything, but that I agreed to do so. If you agree to be a bridesmaid, you must accept your bridesmaid duties 100% with open arms.

With all the frustrations, bad dresses, endless parties and money spent, most importantly cherish sharing this time with your friend. You will never have another moment like this. You are one of her most special friends, honored to be part of her wedding day. That’s enough for anyone to say “yes” all over again.

Happy planning!